I read somewhere that political scientists say that Americans pick their presidents by who they would feel most comfortable sitting down and having a beer with. I watched the debates last night and thought about what a beer test would reveal about the candidates.
Going out for a beer with Kerry would probably be a bit of a bore. He gave all the signs of being a serious policy wonk, a Clinton without Clinton's ability to connect with people, but thankfully also without Clinton's pathological need for approval. He would probably spent the evening telling you about his ideas for health care and something esoteric like "The New Energy Economy", and would probably forget to drink his beer. It would be an early evening, and it wouldn't be the kind of thing I would do to relax.
Going out for a beer with Bush would probably start off a lot better. He would be charming, backslapping and solicitous of your well-being. However, he had that look and manner that tell you that after the second beer, he would start to change. He'd start complaining about how everybody was against him at work, and the company had it in for him, even though he hadn't done anything wrong. After the third beer, he'd get up to go to the bathroom and he'd start a fight with someone who "bumped" into him at the bar. When you refused to join the fight, he'd depart in a huff, leaving you stuck with the bill, a furious bartender, and worrying who he was going to kill while driving in that state.
It might not be the best set of choices, but I'll take the bore any day.
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I gotta disagree with your initial assessment of drinking beers with W. No way is he charming, backslapping, or solicitous of your well-being unless you're second or third generation money. The guy is such an elitist snob that they should name an award after him.
If you're just a regular Joe, first thing he does is find a denigrating nickname, you know, just for fun, to show how much he cares, like Baldy, or Tubbs.
Then while you're trying to strike a conversation, he's busy scanning the room. There's gotta be somebody around that's better off than you. He's "yeah yeahing" your points, "uh huh" and "sure, sure," while never making eye contact.
Before you're halfway through your beer -- and before he's even touched his, because, supposedly, he's all dry and everything -- whether he finds what he's looking for he's not, he's all "well, it's been fun, but I gotta go."
But, yes, he does still stick you with the tab.
Posted by: RKB on October 11, 2004 12:46 PMYou'll get stuck with the bill with either of them, but Kerry will let you know it up front, whereas Dubya will pass it off as a tax rebate or something.
I'd rather have a beer with David Cobb or even Ralph Nader. At least they'd be interesting to talk to, and I'd wager Cobb has better taste in beers than either Kerry or Bush.
Posted by: Gene on October 13, 2004 12:46 PMRKB,
you may be right about Bush, but lots of people seem to find him charming, and "nice one on one". Don't know how, but that is what I hear.
Gene,
I don't know about Cobb, but I spent a little time around Nader once -- talk about self absorbed wonks. I don't want to denigrate all his past achievements, he is doing that plenty well on his own, but he would not be a fun guy to have a beer with -- he'd be telling you about all the carcinogens in hops...
I'll take self-absorbed over dishonestly self-absorbed gee-i'm-a-compassionate-conservative-and-i-feel-your-pain any day.
Posted by: Gene on October 14, 2004 04:20 PMRichard Cohen, alleged liberal, thought Bush was likable"
"The president I have in mind is the funny, good-natured regular guy I once saw on the campaign trail -- a man of surprisingly quick wit and just plain likeability."
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A34164-2004Oct14.html
Go figure
Posted by: anon on October 15, 2004 01:18 AM